If Joy Rides Are Wrong, I Don't Want To Be Right

ANCHORAGE, Alaska -- Anchorage police say a city van used to pick up drunken people was taken on a joyride by a man suspected of drunken driving.

The Anchorage Daily News reports that 35-year-old Donny H. Weston was arrested late Thursday after police say he got into a Community Service Patrol van parked with the keys in the engine. 

Police say social workers were attending inebriated people when Weston got into the van.

Police say Weston drove the van for a significant distance, including driving against traffic, and he eventually crashed the van into a bus and ditched it.

The van is part of a city program that picks up inebriated people and shuttles them to sleeping center.

Police say the inebriated men in the back of the van didn't notice the joyride.

First the disclaimer:  obviously, driving drunk is wrong.  With that said, do you think this guy slapped a "Irony is My Co-pilot" bumper sticker before he took off?  Is driving drunk people around the best or worst job ever?  I would guess it really varies.  My guess is that in Anchorage, AK you're getting a lot of drunk fisherman and hunters, probably not the easiest crowd to subdue.  


When I was in college, a friend and I had a school van because we had to move some AV equipment before and after a hockey game.  After the game, it was about 10 PM, prime going out time.  So, what did we do?  We took the school van, drove around campus picking hammered people up and dropping them off at bars.  IT WAS AMAZING.  Doing this for a part time job would be amusing for a while, especially if you are a dude and only have to pick up drunk girls.


Since I am on the topic of joy rides, has anyone recently driven a golf cart that wasn't on a golf course?  This, also, is amazing.  I had one for work in the spring because we were hosting a conference and you honestly feel like such a boss.  I was wearing a suit, probably had a clip board or something and was just buzzing around the place.  Picking people up, bringing them to wherever they needed it be, it was great.  It was like "The Transporter 6: Bankrupt and Desperate."


The best part of this article?  The last line: "Police say the inebriated men in the back of the van didn't notice the joyride."




-Big Ran