Updated: Thursday, 28 Jul 2011, 7:44 AM EDT
Published : Thursday, 28 Jul 2011, 7:26 AM EDT
ABBEVILLE, La. (AP) - Authorities say bones found in the chimney of a bank in Louisiana have been identified and belong to a man who has been missing for 27 years.
The man's remains were found in May when the bank started renovations. Abbeville police Lt. David Hardy says the remains belong to Joseph W. Schexnider. He was 22 years old when his family last saw him in January 1984.
At that time, Schexnider was wanted for possessing a stolen car, but it's not clear exactly why or when Schexnider entered the chimney.
Officials couldn't determine how he died, but police speculate that he starved.
The bank closed off the chimney in the mid to late 1980s.
Copyright © 2011 The Associated Press. All rights reserved
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Okay, so all I want to say is, seriously? Honestly, a human being goes 'missing' for 27 years and his bones are then found in a chimney? Also, if it's true that he starved to death, that must have been a very long and painful process. Also, if you were stuck in a chimney, or anywhere for that matter, wouldn't you make noise? And, it's not like it's air-tight or soundproof. Somebody must have known SOMETHING! I know it's Louisiana, so I shouldn't expect much, but I'm having a really hard time with all of this, so I'd like to reflect by putting together a brief, but appropriately themed playlist:
1. Up On The Roof-The Drifters: Because this is where it all began obviously.
2. Nowhere to Run: Martha Reeves & the Vandellas: If he stole the car, as reported, he was obviously on the run from law enforcement, although I have no idea who would think a chimney would be a good hiding place.
3. Chim Chimney: From "Mary Poppins", possibly one of the WORST movies ever. I hate it, I hate this song, but at least I've found some use for it now. I don't need to explain any further, the title says it all.
4. Up on the House Top (or in this case, Bank Top): How do we know the bones that they found do not belong to Santa Claus? Just a thought....
5. "Trapped in the Closet"-R.Kelly: Ok, so again, we know he was trapped in a chimney, but being trapped is being trapped, regardless. Plus it's R.Kelly, so it's extra ridiculous and it would be a waste to NOT feature part of his collection any time it is appropriate (and when ISN'T it appropriate, really?)
That is all for right now!
-KC Jones
