Iron Mike Continues to Shine

 I wish there was some way I could incorporate "wombshifter" into everyday conversation, but I don't see how this could happen.  Based on this interview and his performance on the Charlie Sheen Roast last night, I think Mike is making a push to become the go to for philosophical debates or reflections on current events.

I mean, Iron Mike has made a major turnaround. From the Hangover, to political commentary, to poetry. That face tattoo is still distracting as sh!t though. No matter how many times I see it, I never get use to it.

 

The more I think about it, Sarah Palin should have, 100%, chosen Glen Rice.  Everything may have worked out better for both of them.  She could be a news reporter, Glen, would still be a retired NBA player, they would probably still have a son playing starting at guard for Georgia Tech (based on both of their athletic abilities), Palin wouldn't be exposed to be dumb as rocks, would probably actually have traveled outside the US, wouldn't have a a grandson who's father's name is Levi, and Glen would have married his true love and not have to watch his ex-wife on "Real Housewives of Miami," and most importantly, she wouldn't be married to a snow mobile racer or whatever her husband is right now.  Win-win all around.

-Big Ran

Too Good to Pass Up

I'll cut to the chase a bit here.  Last week reports surfaced that Sarah Palin boned Glen Rice (most random pairing ever?).

"In the book, which will be published on September 20^th, McGinniss claims Sarah had a steamy interracial hookup with basketball stud GLEN RICE less than a year before she eloped with her husband Todd.

Sarah hooked up with the NBA great, then a 6-foot-8 junior at the University of Michigan when he was playing in a college basketball tournament in Alaska in 1987, the book says. At the time, Sarah, just out of college, was working as a sports reporter for the Anchorage TV station KTUU.

A publishing source told The ENQUIRER that McGinniss claims Sarah had a “fetish” for black men at the time and he quotes a friend as saying Sarah had “hauled (Rice’s) ass down.”

A source unrelated to the book told The ENQUIRER, Todd was very much in the picture at the time and the couple married just nine months later.

In the book, McGinniss quotes Rice as confirming the one-night stand."

Now, there are the excerpts from the book that I think comes out today:

"After her graduation, Sarah returned to Alaska and worked on the sports desk of Anchorage television station KTUU. On weekends, she'd sometimes appear on camera, delivering sports reports during the 10:00 PM newscast.

Her attitude toward people of color was evolving. In Anchorage, she even dated black men. A friend says, "Sarah and her sisters had a fetish for black guys for a while."

Each year, over Thanksgiving weekend, the University of Alaska hosted a basketball tournament called the Great Alaska Shootout, featuring some of the country's best teams. In 1987, one of the top squads to visit Anchorage was the University of Michigan, led by six-foot-eight junior Glen Rice, number 41.

Rice would lead Michigan to the NCAA Championship in 1989, appearing on the cover ofSports Illustrated and setting a scoring record for the NCAA tournament that stands today. After graduating from Michigan as the school's all-time leading scorer, he starred in the NBA for fifteen years.

Whether in her professional capacity as a sports reporter or simply as a basketball groupie who'd begun to find black men attractive, Sarah linked up with the Rice during the weekend tournament. One friend recalls, "They went out. I suspect it was more than that. I can't say I know they had sex, but I remember Sarah feeling pretty good that she'd been with a black basketball star."

In one version of the story, Sarah's encounter with Rice took place in her sister Molly's dorm room at the University of Alaska Anchorage. "She hauled his ass down," a friend says, "but she freaked out afterward. Hysterical, crying, totally flipped out. The thing that people remember is her freak-out, how completely crazy she got: I fucked a black man!She was just horrified. She couldn't believe she'd done it."

Glen Rice remembers the weekend quite differently. When I spoke to him by telephone in March 2011, he said, "I remember it as if it was yesterday. She was a sweetheart. I met her almost as soon as we got out there."

Rice does not recall being in a university dorm room. "We hung out mostly at the hotel where the team was staying," he told me. "We just hit off. In a short time, we got to know a lot about one another. It was all done in a respectful way, nothing hurried."

"So you never had the feeling she felt bad about having sex with a black guy?" I asked.

"No, no, no, nothing like that," Rice said. "Even after I left Alaska, we talked a lot on the phone. I think right up until the time she got married. She was a gorgeous woman. Super nice. I was blown away by her. Afterward, she was a big crush that I had. I talked about her for a long time. Only good things. She was a well-rounded young lady. It's amazing the way that's stayed with me. I think the utmost of her and I felt that way from the start."

I can honestly say that if you told me Sarah Palin hooked up with a 15 year NBA player who ended up carrying a major torch for her, I don't think Glen Rice would have ever crossed my mind.  Responses to this and more insanity will continue in the next post.

-Big Ran

PS:  I wish I could have bought stock in Aqua Net in the early 80s.  I could have retired by the time I was 11 and bought all the Reebok Pumps I wanted.


PPS:  Initially, there were just reports that Glen Rice confirmed the story and I was thinking, "Of course he friggin' confirmed that story.  Who wouldn't?"  I would confirm any rumor like that because there is at least some chance I could profit from it.  However, seeing those Rice quotes, he was just plain out in love with Palin.  Imagine if Sarah Palin married Glen Rice and became a news reporter?  Wow.  I kind of just blew my mind there.  Maybe she would have been the one asking people what newspapers they read instead of being the one who looked borderline illiterate.

I have a vast variety of sources too.  Friggin' awesome line.  God, I hope she runs for President, Palin is comedy gold.

Stuck in My Head

This song will get stuck in your head for weeks if you hear it.  I like this jam, but man, every station has this going 24-7.  On the plus side, it always makes me think of Reebok Pumps.  How awesome were those when they came out?  Remember when Dee Brown pumped it up, then did the eye-covered dunk in the NBA Dunk Contest?  Definitely the highlight of 6th grade.



How about Shawn Kemp 50 pounds and 8 kids lighter?  I LOVE OLD SCHOOL NBA HIGHLIGHTS!

-Big Ran

PS:  What's up with the guitar player of that band being good looking?  I like my rock stars ugly and riddled with drugs, not looking like they stepped out of a JCrew catalog.  The last thing rock stars need is even more and easier access to chicks. 

Two weeks is WAY too long not to post, and honestly, I've felt guilty.  It's a shame my job is standing in the way of screwing off at work.  Anyway, I need to catch up on a few things that have happened in the last couple of weeks, so even if they are old news, they have to be covered.

-Big Ran

Irrational Rant...Tommy Boy

I truly can't take it anymore. As you all know from prior posts, Tom Brady just gets on my last nerve (truthfully, with my personality, that's not hard to do, BUT still....).and has ever since he began canoodling with now wife Gisele. He's lost all of his manhood & the Pats haven't won a Superbowl since that whole match made in heaven began. So, I shouldn't be surprised that he has renewed his contract/association with "UGGSs" boots (which, in the United States, are for teenage girls and trendy women). I'm not surprised, but I am just infuriated. Dude, how about becoming a spokesperson for something that "XY" chromosomes are actually into?

I started to do a little research last night, and I've come to the conclusion that his current behavior (acting like a girl) shouldn't be that much of a surprise, especially in light of some of the earlier ads/pictures I've found. Note that they were well before Gisele. So, she can be blamed for his worsening condition, his flowing locks, and his Tommy Hollywood persona, but apparently the tendencies were there all along, just waiting to be released!

Exhibit A: Now, I know this ad campaign was for charity (can't remember, but I think AIDS or cancer), and it's really great that he was involved. I can never fault him as far as his charitable contributions are concerned. However, I totally CAN fault this picture. Nice sleeveless, collared dressy shirt AND, even better---nice placement of the bandanna. Those jeans are even walking a fine line between light blue & possible stone washed. Even if he wasn't responsible for the idea, he was/is responsible for allowing it to happen. I mean, as everyone who loves and defends him says, 'He's Tom Brady, he can do whatever he wants"...WELL, case in point---he did whatever he wanted in this ad. And apparently, his desire was to look a little light in his cleats.

Exhibit B: Ok, so I don't even know what this was for, but I know that it's dead wrong. Again, his feminine qualities are shining through. And it's not because he's cuddling with a baby goat while giving the camera bedroom eyes.....oh wait, that's exactly why. I had never seen this pic before, and quite honestly, it may be one of the funniest things I've ever seen. I can see they are trying to make him appear 'manly' by adding a couple of spots of 'dirt' (probably really mascara smeared about), but it's NOT working. And, the gloves? Those are probably to protect his freshly manicured, well groomed hands.

Exhibit C: So, after he didn't get one of the lead roles in "Brokeback Mountain", he agreed to sign on as the spokes'man' for Stetson cologne. Stetson? Really? Come on dude! How about something good that isn't sold at CVS or worn by people's fathers and/or grandfathers. Again, he's doing NOTHING to help his cause here. Thankfully, I don't care about football (I mean, I'm happy for the Patriots when they win, but I have no vested interest), so I don't have to feel disappointed and/or embarrassed by Tommy Boy's choices. However, because I'm a red-blooded American woman, I still find myself very turned off by these things.

 Exhibit D: It's all over folks, the full transformation has taken place. He's married and controlled by Gisele, he's fully Hollywood, the team no longer produces the way they are capable of (note, they are producing, and they are still a league leader, but they keep falling short when it matters the most), and Tommy Bundchen, oops, I mean, Brady, has long, flowing tresses & an UGGs spokesman contract now.


Tommy, you still have a chance to redeem yourself as a man (not as a player, the talent is and has always been there and additionally has been backed up with Superbowls, etc), so please, take a look at things and re-evaluate before it's too late. The clock is ticking.....

Ummmm.....

 

 

-KC Jones

Dear Delonte....

The NBA Lockout is obviously a very sore subject for me as the only THING I can say that I truly love is NBA Basketball. From the time the season officially ends in June until televised preseason games begin at the beginning of October, I feel like a part of my soul is missing. Usually, I have a bunch of games DVR'd to help get me through the off season, however, thanks to Charter Communications' upgrade this summer, my cache was wiped out. So I sit here anxiously awaiting some news...any news, on when this ridiculousness will be over.

Apparently, I'm not the only one stressed about the situation. A couple of weeks ago, Celtics guard and one of our faves here at "The Takeover" tweeted about the hardships he was facing in light of the lockout. Who you ask? Well, the answer shouldn't suprise you---it was none other than Le-Ego's potential stepfather, Delonte West. I swear to God I'm not making this up. Here is the ESPN article for proof:

Delonte West to Home Depot?

Although he's made over $14 million in the NBA, Delonte West tweeted recently that he is "broke" and has applied for a job at Home Depot.


"It's official.. Pride 2 the side.. just filled out a application at Home Depot.. Lockout aint a game," the Celtics guard tweeted.


West is on probation for a weapons charge and also tweeted that he wasn't allowed to pursue basketball opportunities overseas.


"Can't even get that over seas money," he tweeted. "Judge said it's a no go on leaving the country."


West has battled bipolar disorder during his career and also posted this to Twitter: "Broke down in the ATM line.. 25 cars behind me and I already reached my daily limit... I'm broke n my cars broke.. Where's my therapist???"


Appearing in only 24 games this past season, the 27-year-old West averaged 5.6 points in his second stint with the Celtics.


I'm so sorry Delonte. While some of your buddies are heading overseas to play, you can't leave the country due to some crazy extra curricular activities---and on top of that, your car AND bank account are broke! And, not to rub salt in the wound, but this is all on top of a failed relationship with Gloria James! Well Delonte, they say that bad things tend to happen in threes. Maybe that means it's time for your luck to change! Regardless, good for you for applying at the Depot! A job is a job after all, and you can bet your ass I'll be showing up there weekly if you get it! You'll probably even get a bonus for all of the extra business you'll be bringing into the store! But even if you don't get it, I see another opportunity for you after watching the clip below. Hey, if Ron Artest is on the new roster for Dancing With The Stars, having no experience, and despite his troubled past, I see NO reason why you wouldn't be welcomed with open arms. By the way, notice around the one minute, ten second mark--you seriously look like a little leprechaun doing an Irish jig! And, if DWTS isn't something  you'd like to pursue, maybe you and Big Baby could take your show on the road!




Bottom line is this: When it rains it pours D-West...just remember, in the immortal words of Tupac, Keep Ya Head up!

-KC Jones

Can't Tell Me Nothin'...**

So, I've been watching the news over the past few days & keeping up with Tropical Storm 'Lee' which has been bearing down on New Orleans. So, besides the obvious question of 'Why, after the complete devastation, death, and destruction of Hurricane Katrina, did people stay there and rebuild, thinking it would yield different results?'* (see note at the end for clarification), I started wondering WWKD if there is another bad situation down there. Yup! WWKD--What Will Kanye Do? I mean, in the aftermath of Katrina, he completely figured George W. out, and much to the dismay of Mike Myers, he shared his discovery on national television:



So, if now or in the near future there's another natural disaster in the Gulf Region, is everyone's favorite rapper going to declare that President Barack Obama also does not care about black people? I really hope he comes out with something like that---after all, Barack is half white, so be may be a racist just like G.W.B.... Plus, there is already bad blood between Kanye & Barack ever since he upstaged Taylor Swift during the VMAS....


And truthfully, there is NOTHING Kanye could say or do that would amaze me. But again, I suppose he's just 'misunderstood' and we should all be more accepting of him. Obviously his comments about Bush take the cake, but here other ridiculous rants & crazy comments by Kanye:










And, besides Barack Obama's comments, here are two of my other favorite celebrity reactions to his Taylor Swift VMA shenanigans:


*My money's on 50 here and always....


*Snoop is unreal....and I think he'd be just the one to administer the kick in the ass...

*(yes, I know it is a beautiful place and home to many people, but I just couldn't imagine rebuilding THERE after I lost everything and ran a pretty high risk of losing everything again at some point in the future seeing as though it is below sea level)

**The title of this post is a nod to one of Kanye's song titles....I'm so sharp!

-KC Jones

Planet of the Apes...

I admit it, I'm a dork, & I've been wasting the afternoon away watching a "Keeping Up With The Kardashians" marathon on E! (I would like to defend myself though because I did go to the gym this morning and had a kick ass workout AND I did some cleaning once I got home). Anyway, I continue having a problem with Kris Humphries....NBA player and now Kim Kardashian's husband (I give it a year....).

First of all, he's just gross & sounds like there isn't a brain in that head of his. He looks like he should have been in "Planet of the Apes" and I'm PRETTY sure he might be the long lost brother of Dirk Nowitzki's lunatic ex-girlfriend Cristal Taylor.

For your consideration:

Cristal Taylor-Queen of the Apes

Kris Humphries-Ape King

Don't you agree? These two are just hideous, both of them...and regardless of my opinion of Kim Kardashian, the fact remains that she is beautiful and could definitely do so much better (both in the personality AND looks department). She is the lesbian crush of heterosexual women everywhere.

Secondly, how can she go from Reggie frigin Bush to THIS? From a woman's perspective, this is just mind blowing and unacceptable. There are so many other men she could get and she chooses a neanderthal. I'm watching him right now on this episode where they are on vaca in Bora Bora and he is making dog noises while in the ocean and whenever he is giving a 'confessional', he sounds ridiculous and he doesn't even look into the camera. Reggie Bush is a phenomenal athlete who has battled through injuries and helped elevate the New Orleans Saints during the 2010 NFL Post Season when they ultimately won the Superbowl. Just like Kris Humphries, right? Ummm...not so much. This dude plays for one of the worst teams in the NBA & despite being the #14 pick in the 2004 draft, hasn't had too much professional success. Granted, some of his stats are decent, and it's not his fault he's been on crappy teams, but the fact remains that Reggie's got it all over him.

Easily two of the best looking people on Earth.

Personally, I think that Kris was just looking for something to do during the NBA Lockout. And sadly, I think our girl Kim took the bait. She's worth more than him, is more well known than him, and is legitimately out of his league! I know it might sound extreme, but I see no difference between Humphries & Sam Cassell, except that Cassell actually has a personality!

The good news is, this marriage will not last long and Kim will have the opportunity to fix her mistake! In the meantime, I will continue singing along to this song that is "Stuck in my Head"....(Sadly there is not an actual video for Sugar Ray's version of the song....btw--I bet Big Ran HATES Sugar Ray....just a feeling)...



-KC Jones

False Advertising (Part II)....

Lindsay Lohan Gets 'Billy Joel' Tattoo

(EndPlay Staff Reports) - Lindsay Lohan has added another tattoo to her ever-growing collection.
TMZ featured a picture of Lohan showing off her new tattoo, inked on the right side of her ribcage, which she got at her favorite tattoo shop Shamrock Tattoos.


The tattoo is the lyrics from Billy Joel's 1989 song, "I Go to Extremes" – something the 25-year-old actress is known for. The tattoo reads, "Clear as a crystal sharp as a knife / I feel like I'm in the prime of my life."


As for the significance of the tattoo and why Lohan chose those lyrics, a source told TMZ, "It represented where she is in life and everything she's been through … it signifies that she's focused."

Read more: http://www.myfoxboston.com/dpps/entertainment/lindsay-lohan-gets-billy-joel-tattoo-dpgoh-20110902-fc_14828649#ixzz1WrXSeJRX

There is absolutely NO way that, based on the title of this article, that other people didn't open it expecting to see a tattoo OF Billy Joel ON her body. I mean, this story isn't even newsworthy, and they knew it, so they had to put a ridiculous title on it to lure people (including myself) into reading it. I would imagine that if SOMEONE was going to get an actual tattoo of BJ on their body, it would be Lindsay. I mean, look at her & consider her history. Would you really be surprised? But instead, you  read on only to be greatly disappointed when you find out that the ink was simply a couple of lines from one of his songs.

My thoughts on her choice of lyrics? She is HARDLY "Clear as a crystal, Sharp as a knife" and, beyond that, she is FAR past "the prime of her life". There were plenty of other lyrics that would be FAR more appropriate. Some that come to mind quickly include:

1. "It's not a habit, it's cool, I feel alive...If you don't have it you're on the other side...I'm not an addict (maybe that's a lie)"- K'S CHOICE, "Not An Addict"


2. "They tried to make me go to rehab, I said No, No, No'"- AMY WINEHOUSE, "Rehab"


3. "I've been caught stealing; once when I was 5...I enjoy stealing. It's just as simple as that. Well, it's just a simple fact. When I want something, I don't want to pay for it."- JANE'S ADDICTION, "Been Caught Stealin'"


4. "Is it my imagination? Or have I finally found something worth living for? I was looking for some action. But all I found was cigarettes and alcohol."-OASIS- "Cigarettes & Alcohol"


5. "I'm a hazard to myself. Don't let me get me. I'm my own worst enemy"-PINK- "Don't Let Me Get Me"


-KC Jones

The Mile High Club....

Woman's Erotic Dancing Forces Flight to Turn Back to Russia

(NewsCore) - A flight from Moscow to London was turned back Friday when a drunken female passenger started performing erotic dances in front of shocked passengers.


The 07:00am flight from Moscow's main Domodedovo airport did an about-turn 15 minutes after the take-off because of the 39-year-old woman's antics, Ria Novosti news agency reported.


"The woman was in a state of insobriety, inconveniencing the passengers, taking off their glasses and dancing erotic dances," a spokesman for transport police was quoted as saying.


The passenger was arrested upon landing and sent for a medical examination. The spokesman said she was "in a good condition, but maybe a little drunk," adding that she may have carried alcohol on board.


The report did not specify which airline was operating the flight.


Read more: http://www.myfoxboston.com/dpps/news/offbeat/woman-erotic-dancing-forces-flight-to-turn-back-to-russia-dpgonc-20110826-fc_14730801?obref=obinsite#ixzz1WrQB5iCO

Ok, this article is just awesome. MAYBE I should be disgusted by this woman, but I am actually kind of jealous of her. Could you imagine having the balls (well, not the balls, but you get the point) to get up and act like this? I wouldn't want to do erotic dances on a plane, but she obviously doesn't care what anyone thinks. I know she was drunk, but as they say, "A drunken man's words are a sober man's thoughts", and I'd have to say the same is true when actions are involved. This can't be chalked up to her being young and dumb as she is 39 years old.

Also, let's be serious, she wasn't 'inconveniencing' the passengers....she was probably the best entertainment they'd ever seen AND I bet there wasn't one person on that flight having anxiety or claustrophobia during that time because they were so focused on her. Maybe she was figuring she could take the edge off of flying by giving the people something to talk about. If she was even REMOTELY decent looking (we're going to have to look into this further to confirm), the guys were happy. And if she was gross? It became hysterical.

I love when the actions of adults are described as 'antics'---it really adds to the insanity of a situation....I bet that people would gladly pay extra for flights if they could be guaranteed an experience like this. I mean, we constantly have to worry about terrorism, etc when flying and they chose to turn the flight around for this? That's the only bad part...they screwed up the flight for the other passengers.

I have a sneaking suspicion that this woman was MORE than willing to subject herself to the pat-downs in the security line...as a matter of fact, I bet that was her opening act. Like it or not, you have to agree that this show was better than any in-flight movie they could have shown....except for "Showgirls"..."Showgirls" would probably rival this as far as cheesy entertainment by women is concerned.

Could somebody help clarify what "erotic dancing" entails? I mean, I'm thinking a strip club type of thing, but there is no mention of her disrobing (thankfully), so I'm having a hard time imagining what this must have looked like. Someone on that flight HAD to have videotaped this using their phone. Now we'll just have to patiently wait and see....



-KC Jones