This is one of my favorite songs of the mid/late 90's and always reminds me of high school. I still love it and it's been stuck in my head for about a day now. It's so frigin catchy and the white overalls in the video guarantee a good laugh every time I watch it.
Couple of things:
1. The Penny Hardaway puppet playing the piano? Innovative and awesome...and further strengthening the NBA/Hip-Hop connection. I wonder if he really knows how to play the piano....I'm betting not.
2. How could they (and we) ever have thought the overalls were stylish? Especially white ones....
3. I'm going to start bringing "No Diggity" back into my vocab, hardcore....that's actually one of my New Year Resolutions....no doubt.... (get it?)
-KC Jones
Monday, January 2, 2012
Thursday, December 22, 2011
KC Jones' Top 5 Songs That Ruin Christmas....
...in my humble opinion.
5. "Little Saint Nick"- The Beach Boys
I don't know if it's the fact that some of the high pitched notes can only be heard by dogs, or my general disdain for "The Beach Boys", but this song makes me want to punch babies and kick puppies....
4. "Santa Baby"- BY ANYONE
Hate isn't a strong enough word. Add Madonna to the mix and I'm in a blind rage. Why is she even singing a Christmas song? At age 50-something, she hasn't even decided on a religion or an accent yet! Also, no need to bring sex and Santa Claus together you whores!
3. "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus"- Again, BY ANYONE...
...but particularly by The Jackson 5. The shouldn't have been singing Christmas or any holiday songs as they were raised as Jehovah's Witnesses and therefore do not celebrate. I guess dollar signs trumped religious ties as far as Joe and Katherine were concerned. Again, why are we sexualizing (is that even a word?) Santa Claus?? FAIL!
2. "I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas"
Seriously? The voice is so enraging that I'd rather slide down a cactus plant than listen to it. Also, nobody wants a hippopotamus for Christmas, or for any other holiday.
1. "War Is Over"
First she ruins "The Beatles", and then she puts her grubby paws into the mix and ruins Christmas. When I hear this song, it doesn't put me into a festive mood, it actually makes me depressed. The actual music video starts at the 6:10 mark and it's full of morbid, depressing, and horrific images. I fail to see the connection to Christmas. I fail to understand why the radio stations play it after Rudolph and before Feliz Navidad. I fail to understand why John Lennon and Yoko were so obnoxious, greasy, and hairy. It should be mentioned here that I DESPISE "The Beatles" and am not afraid to say it. I respect their robotic, head bobbing place in musical history, but I hate them...however, I hate this song far worse.
Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, and may you all avoid these songs over the next few days!
P.S. I would have included "Dominic The Donkey" here, but I didn't even want to give it any validation as an actual song.
P.P.S. I was going to do a supplemental post to Big Ran's Top 5 Christmas Songs, naming my own, but then got this idea and he supported it, raising a very valid point that I misinterpreted (read from the bottom up down below) and we almost got a friendship divorce:
-KC Jones
5. "Little Saint Nick"- The Beach Boys
I don't know if it's the fact that some of the high pitched notes can only be heard by dogs, or my general disdain for "The Beach Boys", but this song makes me want to punch babies and kick puppies....
4. "Santa Baby"- BY ANYONE
Hate isn't a strong enough word. Add Madonna to the mix and I'm in a blind rage. Why is she even singing a Christmas song? At age 50-something, she hasn't even decided on a religion or an accent yet! Also, no need to bring sex and Santa Claus together you whores!
3. "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus"- Again, BY ANYONE...
...but particularly by The Jackson 5. The shouldn't have been singing Christmas or any holiday songs as they were raised as Jehovah's Witnesses and therefore do not celebrate. I guess dollar signs trumped religious ties as far as Joe and Katherine were concerned. Again, why are we sexualizing (is that even a word?) Santa Claus?? FAIL!
2. "I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas"
Seriously? The voice is so enraging that I'd rather slide down a cactus plant than listen to it. Also, nobody wants a hippopotamus for Christmas, or for any other holiday.
1. "War Is Over"
First she ruins "The Beatles", and then she puts her grubby paws into the mix and ruins Christmas. When I hear this song, it doesn't put me into a festive mood, it actually makes me depressed. The actual music video starts at the 6:10 mark and it's full of morbid, depressing, and horrific images. I fail to see the connection to Christmas. I fail to understand why the radio stations play it after Rudolph and before Feliz Navidad. I fail to understand why John Lennon and Yoko were so obnoxious, greasy, and hairy. It should be mentioned here that I DESPISE "The Beatles" and am not afraid to say it. I respect their robotic, head bobbing place in musical history, but I hate them...however, I hate this song far worse.
Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, and may you all avoid these songs over the next few days!
P.S. I would have included "Dominic The Donkey" here, but I didn't even want to give it any validation as an actual song.
P.P.S. I was going to do a supplemental post to Big Ran's Top 5 Christmas Songs, naming my own, but then got this idea and he supported it, raising a very valid point that I misinterpreted (read from the bottom up down below) and we almost got a friendship divorce:
From: Big Ran
Sent: Thursday, December 22, 2011 1:47 PM
To: KC Jones
Subject: RE:
Sent: Thursday, December 22, 2011 1:47 PM
To: KC Jones
Subject: RE:
No, you misunderstand. I mean, what else would you need to your personal top five? That’s why a worst list is a great idea.
Damn, woman.
Dude, Wham’s Last Christmas is the ONLY song you need at Christmas! Blasphemy I tell you! The baby Jesus would be devastated to read such a hurtful comment!
I like that a lot. Other than Wham, what do you need?
Actually, should I do the Top 5 WORST Christmas Songs of all time? (In my opinion and then you can add?)
-KC Jones
Holy Sh!t, LeVar Burton is Awesome!
 |
| I screen grabbed the sh!t out of this. |
Investigative journalism is not dead! In my in depth research for my last blog post, I googled LeVar Burton because I wasn't sure how to spell his first name. Well, you're all welcome because check this sh!t out:
Raise your hand if you knew LeVar Burton was in the "Word Up" video...Bueller? Bueller? Yeah, didn't think so. Here are some other highlights from his Wikipedia page, which I take as Gospel:
Burton was born to American parents at the U.S. Army Landstuhl Regional Medical Center in West Germany. His mother, Erma Jean (née Christian), was a social worker, administrator, and educator. His father, Levardis Robert Martyn Burton, was a photographer for the U.S. Army Signal Corps, and at the time was stationed at Landstuhl. Burton and his two sisters were raised by his mother in Sacramento, California. Burton was raised Catholic and, at the age of thirteen, entered St. Pius X seminary in Galt, California to become a priest. He attended Christian Brothers High School and graduated in the class of 1974. He is a graduate of University of Southern California's School of Theatre.
How about that? How do they let kids study to become priests at 13? Talk about Bad Idea Jeans. All thirteen year olds want to do is jerk off and dream of finding their Dad's stash of Playboys, not praying all day and taking vows of poverty and celibacy.
That little early life bio was the big one in addition to the "Word Up" bombshell, but while we all know Burton was the host of "Reading Rainbow," he was also the executive producer. That's big time. He is married (to the woman below) and has a 17 year old daughter.
CUE THE MUSIC!!!!!!!!!!!!
-Big Ran
PS: I bet someone could make a sweet remix of this jam. I would buy that on Amazon for $0.49.
Big Ran's Top Five Christmas Songs
5. Eric Cartman - Oh Holy Night
I was torn with posting the original show version where Cartman keeps getting tazed or the album version. I went with the album version because let's face it, studio cuts are always going to be better than a live performance.
4. Sleigh Ride
This is a bit more of a classic choice here and you have to LOVE the video. I don't think it would be possible for there to be more mustaches in this video unless they filmed a NAMBLA convention.
3. Kurtis Blow - Christmas Rap
KC introduced me to this one and when you see my #1 choice you will understand why this is on here.
2. Elvis - Blue Christmas
I can do a mean rendition of this song. It looks like Elvis was a bit past his prime in this video, but you know he was still crushing both donuts and p*ssy at this point.
1. Run D.M.C - Christmas in Hollis
If you don't like this song, you might as well pack your bags and move to Communist Russia. Or North Korea, that should be a stable and inviting environment for a while. I have LOVED this song ever since I saw it on Reading Rainbow (LeVar Burton up in this bitch!). The only thing that keeps this from scoring a perfect 100 is that creepy as f*ck elf in the beginning. That little f*cker will haunt your dreams.
Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Kwanza, and Happy New Year to everyone!
-Big Ran
I was torn with posting the original show version where Cartman keeps getting tazed or the album version. I went with the album version because let's face it, studio cuts are always going to be better than a live performance.
4. Sleigh Ride
This is a bit more of a classic choice here and you have to LOVE the video. I don't think it would be possible for there to be more mustaches in this video unless they filmed a NAMBLA convention.
3. Kurtis Blow - Christmas Rap
KC introduced me to this one and when you see my #1 choice you will understand why this is on here.
2. Elvis - Blue Christmas
I can do a mean rendition of this song. It looks like Elvis was a bit past his prime in this video, but you know he was still crushing both donuts and p*ssy at this point.
1. Run D.M.C - Christmas in Hollis
If you don't like this song, you might as well pack your bags and move to Communist Russia. Or North Korea, that should be a stable and inviting environment for a while. I have LOVED this song ever since I saw it on Reading Rainbow (LeVar Burton up in this bitch!). The only thing that keeps this from scoring a perfect 100 is that creepy as f*ck elf in the beginning. That little f*cker will haunt your dreams.
Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Kwanza, and Happy New Year to everyone!
-Big Ran
I'd Be Pissed Off Too
APPLETON — Police say a drunken woman repeatedly choked her 11-year-old daughter on
Sunday after becoming angered by the poor play of the Green Bay Packers.
The 36-year-old Grand Chute woman was charged Monday in Outagamie County Court with
felony child abuse and misdemeanor counts of bail jumping and disorderly conduct.
Police were called about 8:15 p.m. Sunday to a Grand Chute hotel where the girl told police
her mother grabbed her by the neck during the football game. The woman was drinking alcohol
and became upset because the team was losing.
The girl said that after the Packers lost 19-14 to the Kansas City Chiefs, her mother choked her
again with enough force that the girl couldn’t breathe, and asked her, “Do you want to die?” the
criminal complaint says.
Police saw red marks and scratches on the girl’s neck.
The Post-Crescent is not naming the woman to protect the identity of the child.
The child abuse charge carries a maximum sentence of 12½ years of imprisonment and
$25,000 in fines. The woman could face up to nine months in jail if convicted of bail jumping
and 90 days on the disorderly conduct count. She is being held in jail on a $2,500 cash bond.
Look, I am not about to endorse child abuse, but I do think there are some special circumstances
here. I remember how I felt after the Patriots lost in the Super Bowl on their quest to go 19 - 0; I
was down, I just felt empty. My buddy Danny was honestly depressed. He gave up on sports
altogether and didn't watch any sporting event for over two years.
And that's the thing; if you don't deal with your emotions right away, they just fester until it all boils
over.
This past Sunday, the Green Bay Packers headed into a game against the lowly Kansas City Chiefs
in search of win number 14 and extending their perfect season, only to look terrible and throw history
down the drain. If Packer Mom here didn't vent her emotions, who knows what would have happened.
She may have gone on a killing spree. This way, she just choked out her daughter a bit, gets it over
with and can move on to week 16 of the NFL season.
Maybe the 11 year old should get some Jujitsu lessons from Christmas. That's the one where you
use your opponent's force, strength, and weight against them, right? I would imagine that would be
the way to go because I picture this Packer Mom coming in at two and a half bills.
-Big Ran
Stuck In My Head - Stuck in My Office Edition
I am one of three people in my office today so it's good to have an upbeat jam to get the loins going. This isn't my usual type of tune, but this gets me pretty amped. Amped to do expense reports and find ways to kill a few more hours.
I can't complain since I don't work tomorrow, so if you do, may God have mercy on your soul.
-Big Ran
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
Lunchtime Look-a-like
The Celtics made their preseason debut on Sunday, only about 2 months late due to the lockout. Anyway, as you all know, I just adore Rasheed Wallace and haven't been the same since he retired. However, I will always take consolation in knowing that he played in Boston for a season and came up big when it counted. However, imagine my surprise when I thought he was back on the court, playing with the Celts against the Toronto Raptors. I was overjoyed, and puzzled...how did I not hear about this? I'm usually on top of NBA news. I didn't hear about it, because it didn't happen....and I realized it wasn't him, sad face.
Nope, it was Chris Wilcox, a new addition to the Celtics since the lockout was settled. I don't have too much to say about 'Cox yet (like that? I mean, we called Rasheed, 'Sheed, so I'm just trying to remain consistent), but I will say that he reminds me of the man who coined the phrase, "Ball Don't Lie"!
-Both played for the Detroit Pistons at one point in their careers
-I've now witnessed each of them pleading their cases with the refs during games
-They look very similar (they aren't twins, but there are STRIKING similarities).
-Notice the 'sun' tattoos on each of their right arms as well....just sayin'....
The words of Big Ran below, after I mentioned my thought to him, clearly validated that, unlike the Ghetto Boys, my mind was not playing tricks on me:
-KC Jones
 |
| Chris Wilcox |
 |
| 'Sheed |
-Both played for the Detroit Pistons at one point in their careers
-I've now witnessed each of them pleading their cases with the refs during games
-They look very similar (they aren't twins, but there are STRIKING similarities).
-Notice the 'sun' tattoos on each of their right arms as well....just sayin'....
The words of Big Ran below, after I mentioned my thought to him, clearly validated that, unlike the Ghetto Boys, my mind was not playing tricks on me:
Also, I saw a replay of the Celts game from Sunday and when Wilcox jumped up from the bench at one point I really thought it was Sheed for a second.
 |
| Chris Wilcox |
 | ||
| Rashhhhheeeeeeeed Wallllllace! |
For me, the NBA Season kicking off on Christmas Day is one of the biggest gifts of all...however, I have to admit, it's slightly bittersweet with Rasheed no longer in the league. Love him or hate him, (and you SHOULD love him), he's one of a kind!
Just a little something to help get you into the holiday spirit!
-KC Jones
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
Tuesday Trivia....
So, after my "Last Christmas" post and "Wham!" shout out, you are all aware of my great love for the group. It's only appropriate that today's "Tuesday Trivia" post concerns the lesser known of the duo, Andrew Ridgeley. Specifically, what ever happened to him after Wham! ended? If you've wondered about this, here's your answer:
He has deliberately eschewed the showbiz limelight and spends his time playing golf and surfing while his millions earn interest in the bank.
It was in 1994 that Ridgeley quit the London scene with Bananarama sex kitten Keren Woodward and her son Tom to live in a converted 15th century farm house.
When he does surface, it is to campaign for environmental causes, in particular safer, cleaner water.
While Andrew and George are still close friends, their lives have gone in dramatically different directions since Wham! disbanded in 1986.
After an ill-fated attempt at a solo career, Andrew decided to remain behind the scenes as a songwriter to other artists.
To read the complete article, as this is just a part of it, click here .
-KC Jones
 |
| Then |
It was in 1994 that Ridgeley quit the London scene with Bananarama sex kitten Keren Woodward and her son Tom to live in a converted 15th century farm house.
When he does surface, it is to campaign for environmental causes, in particular safer, cleaner water.
While Andrew and George are still close friends, their lives have gone in dramatically different directions since Wham! disbanded in 1986.
After an ill-fated attempt at a solo career, Andrew decided to remain behind the scenes as a songwriter to other artists.
To read the complete article, as this is just a part of it, click here .
 | ||
| Now |
-----Original Message-----
Sent: Tuesday, December 20, 2011 1:21 PM
To: KC Jones
Subject: RE:
Also, on the way back, one of my friends goes, "You guys want to hear my
favorite Christmas song?" She presses play and it is Wham! She said it
is her favorite Christmas song and it makes her Mom cry every time.
And I think we all know why this is the best song ever; because G-Michael's voice sounds like a combination of both Fergie and Jesus....BEST DAY EVER!
-KC Jones
Office Etiquette/I Hate People...Revolving Doors
This will be a quick post as it's very specific and about one issue; revolving doors. It's also unique in that it is a hybrid post; it will address office etiquette as well my hatred for people. It wasn't a planned post, just something that came to mind after I was almost mortally wounded while using one as I entered my POE this morning. Just a couple of guidelines (as I've seen some pretty random things happening with them in my time here):
1. One person at a time (Part One): Do not attempt to go into the same section of the door as another person unless you are conjoined twins. If you are conjoined twins, you probably shouldn't have to work in this sort of environment anyway. And if you do, please make sure you are in sync in regards to your walking pace.
2. One person at a time (Part Two): Do not 'cut' in front of someone to get in the door first. It revolves, you will have your turn momentarily, and if you are that excited about it, remember, you can walk around and around in it all day long just like a hamster in a wheel. And if you're THAT excited about getting into your POE, I think you should probably seek psychiatric care ASAP.
3. Keep the Pace: This is the issue that prompted my post. I hopped into the revolving door this morning and was pushing it as necessary to get into the building. The Brawny Man hopped in in back of me and pushed the door so damn hard I went flying forward and almost tripped. No joke. I turned around and looked at him like I was a wild jungle animal about to maul his face off. He then proceeded to basically dry hump me the whole way down the hall and onto the elevators. He had no concept of personal space and clearly couldn't read social cues as I shot eye daggers his way.
The revolving door is a very simple concept as far as I'm concerned and if you follow the rules above, there should never be an issue in using it safely and without offending others.
-KC Jones
 |
| If these kids can get the hang of it, why can't adults? |
1. One person at a time (Part One): Do not attempt to go into the same section of the door as another person unless you are conjoined twins. If you are conjoined twins, you probably shouldn't have to work in this sort of environment anyway. And if you do, please make sure you are in sync in regards to your walking pace.
2. One person at a time (Part Two): Do not 'cut' in front of someone to get in the door first. It revolves, you will have your turn momentarily, and if you are that excited about it, remember, you can walk around and around in it all day long just like a hamster in a wheel. And if you're THAT excited about getting into your POE, I think you should probably seek psychiatric care ASAP.
3. Keep the Pace: This is the issue that prompted my post. I hopped into the revolving door this morning and was pushing it as necessary to get into the building. The Brawny Man hopped in in back of me and pushed the door so damn hard I went flying forward and almost tripped. No joke. I turned around and looked at him like I was a wild jungle animal about to maul his face off. He then proceeded to basically dry hump me the whole way down the hall and onto the elevators. He had no concept of personal space and clearly couldn't read social cues as I shot eye daggers his way.
The revolving door is a very simple concept as far as I'm concerned and if you follow the rules above, there should never be an issue in using it safely and without offending others.
Monday, December 19, 2011
Thrill of Victory and Agony of Defeat
After a bunch of rumored deals, David "The Godfather" Stern eventually relented and let the Chris Paul deal go through with the LA Clippers. In the video below you can clearly see DeAndre Jordan, Blake Griffin, and Caron Butler getting fired up for "Lob City:"
Chris Paul looks happy at the press conference and said all the right things. However, there is a bit of a contrast between Chris Paul and his new teammates and the guys he was swapped for...
 |
| Chris Kaman, minutes after he was released from a North Korean prison following Kim Jong Il's death. |
 |
| This picture is downright sad. Eric Gordon (middle), genuinely looks like he is going to cry. |
While I don't agree with what Stern did to the Hornets - Lakers - Rockets deal, I am super pumped that the Lake Show didn't get Chris Paul. Not only that, but that had to give up Lamar Kardashian for absolutely nothing. They now have to rely on Metta World Peace as their starting power forward. At least he didn't loose his teeth in his 20s.
-Big Ran
PS: If Melissa Rohlin can get a job with the LA times and go to Lakers training camp, how does KC not have a job for life with the Boston Globe?
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