A Sad Day in Pittsburgh

Pittsburgh Post Gazette - The city of Pittsburgh will hold a rally at noon Thursday to honor Hines Ward's victory in ABC-TV's "Dancing with the Stars" competition.

The rally will be held in front of the City-County Building on Grant Street.

Mr. Ward and dance partner Kym Johnson will be present.

Fans are encouraged to wear black and gold and bring Terrible Towels to the rally.

"City residents and the Steelers Nation have contacted my office asking for the city to properly thank our hometown hero for once-again shining the spotlight on Pittsburgh," Mayor Luke Ravenstahl said.


In addition, couples are invited to highlight their dancing skills in two-minute YouTube videos for a chance to appear on stage with Mr. Ward and Ms. Johnson. No more than two dancers can appear in the video.

Videos, with the entrants' contact information, must be submitted to CityDWTScontest@gmail.com by 4 p.m. Wednesday.

City officials will pick five videos for posting on the city Facebook page. The three entrants with the most "likes" by 11 a.m. Thursday will be invited on stage for a "dance-off" to be judged by Mr. Ward, Ms. Johnson and Mr. Ravenstahl.

The three finalists will be photographed with Mr. Ward, Ms. Johnson and their Mirror Ball Trophy. Winners of the dance-off will receive autographed Hines Ward jerseys.

In addition, fans who bring non-perishable food items for the Salvation Army can enter a contest with the chance of winning a Terrible Towel signed by Mr. Ward and Ms. Johnson.


Wow.  This is honestly sad.  I always thought it was pathetic when Boston had a rally for Ray Bourque after he won a Stanley Cup with the Colorado Avalanche, but Pittsburgh has taken it to a whole new level.  This is a city who has seen the Pirates win the World Series five times (well, 3 of them were 1960 or earlier and the last was in 1979, so no one under the age of 35 could possibly remember this and I think at this point they have had 20 straight losing seasons), the Penguins just won the Stanley Cup two years ago in 2009 after winning back-to-back in 1991 and 1992, and the Steelers, who are one of the marquee franchises in the NFL, winning the Super Bowl six times including 2005 and 2008.  Its not like they haven't seen success and seen it lately.  I mean, I know they have to live in Pittsburgh and probably all have the black lung, but this is out of control.  I picture Bill Cowher standing there with a single tear streaming down his face in pure unadulterated sadness.  




-Big Ran

PS:  Don't forget your terrible towels.

Peace Be With You....

Well, if you're anything like me, the end of the NBA Season has you depressed and looking for something to fill the void. As I searched for that placeholder, I should have realized that everyone's favorite NBA Citizenship Award winner would definitely do something to make the off-season more interesting.



Yup, that's right, Ron Artest has changed his name to "Metta World Peace". Although we will have to wait until August 26th to find out if the courts will legally recognize this name change request, I have a pretty good feeling it's going to happen.

A Few Questions:
1. When he takes the court next season, what will be on the back of his jersey? "World Peace"? "Peace"?
2. When he gets mouthy, how will the commentators explain it? "World Peace just committed a technical foul".
3. When he is fouled, I can imagine hearing, "A flagrant foul against World Peace".
4. What if he is an All-Star? "World Peace has been selected as a Western Conference All-Star".
5. How will he sign autographs? This is difficult, because his name has been Ron Artest for so long. He might have a hard time transitioning into his new identity...perhaps he'll just start signing by drawing a peace sign.
6. Finally, what if a situation resulting in suspension occurs, like a fight? "World Peace has been suspended". Now that's just scary for all of us.

Seriously. This is pure comedy & I cannot wait to see what ensues. There better NOT be a lockout, I want to enjoy every single second w/ the "Athlete Formally Known As Ron Artest". Big Ran & I are definitely co-presidents of  the World Peace Fan Club.

-KC Jones

Obama Has Another Banner Week

We've already discussed Obama's Best Week Ever here on the Takeover, so I wanted to pass this along as a close second.  If this dude keeps racking up weeks like this, Mitt, Newt, and that nut job from Minny might as well head out on that dusty trail.

This has nothing to do with troop withdrawal and everything to do with capturing Whitey Bulger and getting my new passport processed and sent back to me in five days.  If you don't think Obama had a bullet proof vest and a SWAT jacket on when they stormed Whitey's love nest, you're out of your mind.  Also, if you don't think he was trimming my passport photo and sewing extra pages into it, I don't know what to tell you other than go move to Russia you God damned commie.  You hate freedom and firefighters.

-Big Ran

Is This Person Good Looking?

You all know this chick, she's the T-Mobile commercial chick.  I did, literally the minimum amount of research possible and found out her name is Carly Foulkes, hails from Toronto, and has done predominantly modeling throughout her career. All of her photos are model type shots, so there may be a heavy-handed air brush artist involved.  Who knows.

When I first saw the T-Mobil commercials, I was intrigued, but I think that was more a case of the sun dress phenomena* rather than finding her amazingly attractive.  Lots of artsy / JCrew bathing suit type photos:

From the commercials:

So, is she good looking?  Sure, absolutely, but I wish she would have a hamburger and a protein shake and quit eating dinner with Reggie Miller.

On another note, how much do you want to hit that scrawny rapping guy in the second commercial across the back with a folding chair, WWF-style?  In my "research" for this blog I found a listing for "Would you rather bang the T-Mobil girl or punch her white rapper-friend in his smug face."

My answer:  B.

-Big Ran

*Sun Dress Phenomena - the first really warm day in spring when all the sun dresses come out and every chick looks 19.4 times hotter.

Stuck In My Head

I thought I would share the song that's currently stuck in my head.  Why?  I have no idea.  I don't remember the last time I heard this song.



I had never seen this video before and it has to be the most ridiculous video I have ever seen.  Cocain is a hell of a drug.

-Big Ran

WTF Happened to Dave Chappelle?

Ummmm....

So its been about six years since Dave Chappelle stopped filming The Chappelle Show, probably my favorite show of all time, and it looks as though he has pretty much been lifting weights since he got back from his South African odyssey.  Scrawny Dave was funny, one of, if not the best comedians out there, but can he be as funny if he's jacked?  I'm not sure.  I just don't know if Dave pulls off a jacked Tyrone Biggums

 -Big Ran

PS:  Media Takeout should try spelling his name right.

Meeting Look-a-Like

I just had a presentation to make at work and we probably had about 40 people in the room.  Sitting dead center was this guy that was a dead ringer for Kevin Spacey  and it was totally distracting.  At first I was like, "Wow, that dude looks like Kevin Spacey."  By the end of the presentation, I had convinced myself that it was Kevin SPacey and was really trying hard to be an impressive speaker.  During Q&A, bizarro Kevin asked a question and while the tone of his voice was very similar, he clearly hailed from a Western European country (but Kevin Spacey IS AN ACTOR, HE COULD TOTALLY PULL THAT OFF!!!!).  

It ends up it wasn't him, but I was talking to him after everything was done and it could have been a brother or a cousin and it totally threw me off.

-Big Ran

Proof There Is a God

Rolling Stone -  It took Perry a while to learn to embrace her body. "I started praying for [breasts] when I was, like, 11," she says. "And God answered that prayer above and beyond, by, like, 100 times, until I was like, 'Please, stop, God. I can't see my feet anymore. Please stop!' I was a lot more rectangular then. I didn't understand my body. Someone in sixth grade called me 'Over-the-shoulder boulder holder.' I didn't know I could use them. So, what I did was, I started taping them down. How long did I tape them down for? Probably until I was about 19. And, no, I don't have any psychological pain because of it."

I'm not trying to get religious on The Takeover, but just in case anyone was on the fence about a higher power, maybe this pushes you over the edge.  Not sure.  Maybe it was just the power of positive thinking.  Whatever it is, they are real and they're SPECTACULAR!

-Big Ran

Thomas Continues to Own Luongo

Hell yeah, Tim Thomas.  A congrats to Luongo was not only classy, but probably pissed Roberto off and caused more riots in Vancouver.  Also, the fact that he is still rocking the 70s stache because his daughter likes it is fantastic.  When you're that good, you can crush a stache and not have to explain it to anybody.

Did everyone know that "Vezina" is German for whale's vagina?  Stay classy, Tim Thomas, stay classy.

-Big Ran

Whitey Busted in Santa Monica

SANTA MONICA, Calif. (CBS/AP) — Boston mob boss James “Whitey” Bulger was captured near Los Angeles after spending the last 16 years on the run during an epic manhunt that served as a major embarrassment to the FBI and made the fugitive a global sensation as he constantly found a way to elude authorities.

The FBI finally caught the 81-year-old Bulger Wednesday at a residence in Santa Monica along with his longtime girlfriend Catherine Greig just days after the government launched a new publicity campaign to locate the fugitive mobster, said Steven Martinez, FBI’s assistant director in charge in Los Angeles.

The arrest was based on a tip from the campaign, he said.

However, television ads from the campaign did not run in the Los Angeles area, but they were seen in San Diego and San Francisco.

The FBI had been conducting a surveillance operation in the area where the arrest was made, said police Sgt. Rudy Flores, who gave no details of the arrest.

So, after 16 years, Whitey Bulger has finally been brought to justice along with his ride-or-die bitch, Catherine Greig.  I've lived in MA most of my life, and I feel as though Whitey has become this sympathetic hero over his time on the run.  It seems as though people started to believe the tails that he was the Robin Hood of Southie.  This dude killed at least 19 people, was responsible for all the drugs in Southie and diddled little girls, and other mobsters hated him because he ratted them out to the feds.  Have fun in a federal pound-me-in-the-ass prison.   

-Big Ran