Showing posts with label Mugshot. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mugshot. Show all posts

Friday, January 13, 2012

Lunchtime Mugshot


Miami New TimesTravis Williams was arrested on Wednesday for disorderly conduct/breach of the peace, which does not address the question as to why he's covered in a white powder. 

Williams was apparently at the Bayside Marketplace around noon, screaming at and trying to hit patrons, when cops rolled up. He allegedly got into a fighting stance and said: "Fuck you, motherfucker!"

The police officer who filled out the report clearly is the unflappable type. Let's see, African-American ethnicity, 5-foot-9, 164 pounds, brown eyes, bald... and here's the best part: Under "scars, tattoos, and unique physical features", the officer wrote "None visible."

What about, say, the fact that the guy looks like he just fell into Tony Montana's cocaine hot tub?

At least the Miami cops who arrested the guy with half a head had the decency to write in the same box: "Half a Head."

We'd try to call the arresting officer to see if they had any theories, but cops always write their names amazingly messy on police reports. Does that say C. Gravedepersia?

Until we find out, we're left only with our theories. Was he deliciously deloused? Was he trying to gain entry to the Indian Creek Village Country Club? Was he, as our editor Chuck theorized, "robbing a concrete factory?" (Chuck's from a different era.)

If you arrested Powder, or were attempt-smacked by him at Bayside, or are him, or have anything funny to say, please tell us in the comments. This somehow seems like a good opportunity to give away some New Times sunglasses to the best guess.

I couldn't think of a lunchtime look-a-like, but I came across this and honestly can't look at this guy without laughing.

I have two possible guesses who this guy is.  It's either Ashy Larry from The Chappelle Show:

Chappelles Show
The World Series of Dice
www.comedycentral.com
Buy Chappelle's Show DVDsBlack ComedyTrue Hollywood Story

Or, Powder's not quite as albino cousin:



















-Big Ran

Wednesday, August 31, 2011

WTF Happened to Matthew Fox?

This is Matthew Fox's mugshot after being arrested in Cleveland for punching a female bus driver in the chest and stomach.  I mean, as if that's not crazy enough, look at this f*cking picture!  man, I thought when "Lost" ended I was bummed about the ending, but Matthew Fox must have just started boozing non stop and eating deep fried turkeys with Ricki Lake.  I guess when you are on a tropical island for years and only eat some fruit and fish then go back to booze and processed foods you are bound to get a little bloated.

This was the before:


This happened in like a year and a half.  Damn.  I am guessing his next stop is either rehab to avoid jail time or the "Biggest Loser" to shed all the booze and turkey weight.

-Big Ran

KC's comments: That's a damn shame. From the female perspective, it's a huge loss---he was a good looking dude now he resembles the Stay Puff Marshmallow Man, but not even remotely as cute as that character...what a shame