Sie Sehen Mich Rollin, Sie Zu Hassen

Big ups to Volkswagon for using "Ridin' Dirty."  This is like, my song of the year and I am rarely not singing or whistling it.  When this commercial came on the first time, my wife asked my if that's what I always played before the car passed inspection.  Yup.

-Big Ran

PS:  "Sie Sehen Mich Rollin, Sie Zu Hassen" is as close as I could get to "They see me rollin', they hatin'."

Big Ran's Ridin' Dirty Playlist

OK, so my inspection sticker expired in November and I am still rocking that blue 11 (if you're from Mass, you know what I'm talking about).  I was on a long ass business trip that took me into November, and I always like to push the inspection one month every year so that it's like getting one inspection free after the first 11.  I do it just to stick it to the man a little bit.

Anyway, as soon as November 30th and December 1st roll around, one of my headlight's craps out.  No biggie, I go buy some new headlights.  However, it wasn't that simple and it turns out I needed to do a bunch more work to it in order to pass the inspection.  I don't have the time to do the work on my own and I don't have the money to pay a mechanic, so I'm kind of caught in a catch 22 here (or something like that).  So, for the last couple months I've been ridin' dirty minus the guns and drugs, unless you count Advil or prescriptions I may have picked up on the way home from work.

I have completely altered my route to work avoiding all the places I have seen cops parked before and not going through small town centers.  A couple years ago I was pulled over in Wellesley because of an expired inspection sticker at like 7:30 AM on a Saturday.  Of course, it's Wellesley, so the cops literally have nothing better to do, hence why people like me and Dee Brown get pulled over.  

In honor of staying one step ahead of the law, I present Big Ran's Ridin' Dirty Playlist...

1.  UGK - Ridin' Dirty - because they were the originators of the term "Ridin' Dirty."

2.  Snoop - Drop It Like It's Hot - When the pigs try to get at me I'm always parkin' it like its hot.



3.  Sir Mix-a-Lot - My Hooptie - because I am driving this thing into the ground



4.  War - Lowrider - because I also need new shocks and struts, so my whip rides mad low



5.  Mistah FAB - Ghost Ride It - If I roll past the popo, I duck down real low.



6.  Chamillionaire - Ridin' Dirty - Obviously.  This is last because it is sure to get stuck in your head.



-Big Ran


KC Jones' Notes: I'd like to say, this is one of Big Ran's funniest posts yet, and he doesn't need anything added to it, but I'd like to add the following songs:

7. Coolio- Fantastic Voyage- As I'm sure that it IS in fact, a fantastic voyage every time Big Ran gets in the whip and plays the back roads game. Also, there is the whole issue of Coolio mentioning he "ain't got no car" at the beginning of the vid.


8. Dr. Dre- Let Me Ride- As that will be Big Ran's plea to the po-po if they do in fact pull him over....


***Also, with Sir Mix-A-Lot's- My Hooptie- Have truer words have ever been spoken?: “Four door nightmare, truck locks’ stuck. Big dice on the mirror, grill like a truck. Lifters tickin’, accelerator’s stickin’. Somethin’ on my left front wheel keeps clickin’.”

Bravo, Big Ran, Bravo....

-KC Jones

Coincidence or Was Obama Ridin' Dirty?

They see Obama rollin', they hatin'.

NEW YORK (CNNMoney) -- A Chrysler 300C once leased by President Barack Obama is for sale on eBay with the eye-popping "opening bid" of $1 million.

The opening bid, which is dictated by the seller, means that bidding for the car must start at that price.

The woman who posted the car on eBay Motors, Lisa Czibor, said she has received some criticism for the high asking price but that the current owner of the car fully expects to get that amount.

Czibor said in a phone interview with CNNMoney that she is listing the car for someone else but looks forward to getting a commission on the sale. She describes herself as a "life-long Ronald Reagan old-school conservative."

"It's all about the money for me," she said

She's unlikely to get anything like a million dollars, said Craig Jackson, president of the Barrett-Jackson auto auction company.

"Maybe this car would be worth $50,000 to $100,000."

The hearse which carried the body of John F. Kennedy following his 1963 assassination in Dallas recently sold at a Barrett-Jackson auction for $160,000.

Jackson's company has sold several presidential cars and none have ever brought anything approaching that kind of money, he said.

It might help if the car, itself, were innately rare or valuable, but it's not. The car is a stock late-model Chrysler very similar to many thousands of others that are still on the road. With no presidential connection, it would be worth about $20,000 as a used car.

Also, history has yet to render a verdict on Obama's presidency.

A presidential parade limousine used by Franklin Roosevelt, a Cadillac V-16 convertible, was recently auctioned off at an RM Auctions sale in Arizona for $270,000.

The eBay listing provides a few examples of other cars that have sold for surprising amounts, though. A Peugeot once owned by Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad sold for £1.5 million pounds -- roughly $2.4 million.

She also mentions a 1999 Volkswagen Golf once owned by Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger -- now known as Pope Benedict XVI -- which sold for $244,000.

Czibor provided CNNMoney with a scanned copy of an Illinois Certificate of Title showing Barack Obama as the lessee. The car currently has 20,800 miles on it.

She would not say how the car came into the current owner's possession.

A spokesperson for the White House did not immediately comment on the eBay listing.

Obama was a U.S. Senator representing Illinois during the time he owned the car. After driving the Chrysler sedan for over 19,000 miles Obama traded it for a 2007 Ford Escape Hybrid in the summer of 2007 as he was beginning his presidential campaign.

The Chrysler gets about 18 miles per gallon in combined city and highway driving, according to EPA estimates, while the Escape Hybrid gets about 30.

Nothing really good until the end when we see that Obama started rocking the hybrid for the start of his campaign.  At least he didn't trade it in for a Toyota Prius.  People who drive Priuses (Piri?) are f*cking douche bags.  I saw one guy on the highway last week in a Prius with the vanity plate "Hybrid." Really bro?  No sh!t.  If you wanted to be more obvious you should have a plate that reads "Small Dick."  I once heard that people who really care about the environment get a hybrid version of a regular car.  People who want to be applauded and get credit for caring about the environment get a Prius.

Wouldn't it be awesome if the Chrysler this lady was trying to sell belonged to some other dude named Barack Obama?  Or if it belonged to Barak Obamma, no C and two Ms?  A la George Costanza thinking he bought Jon Voight's car (also a Chrysler).

Two songs to get the Friday going for Obama:

-Big Ran